The Lord’s Prayer (2010 J.P. Update)

Baby Jesus, who art in thy golden fleece manger,

adored be thy emaciated little Middle-eastern frame.

Thy off-planet vengeful tribal deity will be done,

on Pluto as it is on Uranus.

Give us our PlayStation and our TMZ,

and forgive us our Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity,

as we forgive the blowhards who trespass on our minds,

and lead us not into Aristotelian two-valued logic,

but deliver us from soul-crunching miscreants,

for thine is the kingdom,

and the power, and the glory,

forever and ever

Ramen (noodles).

8 Responses to “The Lord’s Prayer (2010 J.P. Update)”

  1. 1 dummidumbwit
    July 22, 2010 at 9:33 am

    Ha Ha!! I speechless before your Genius!! Ha Ha!!

  2. July 22, 2010 at 9:50 am

    But sadly, not typeless. Just kidding dd, we luv ya!

  3. 3 c
    July 22, 2010 at 11:05 am

    Powerful statement.

  4. July 26, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    Utterly and completely sacrilegious – burn in hell Peepers!!

  5. July 27, 2010 at 12:32 am


    Sorry if I trampled on your precious sacred Dogma. My personal Jesus gave a hearty chuckle when he read my Lord’s Prayer update. BTW, hell is in YOUR mind.

  6. 7 anti-virus download
    August 10, 2010 at 9:00 am

    did you vote for obama? be honest

  7. August 11, 2010 at 1:28 pm

    Sadly, us ex-cons have been relieved of our privilege to vote 😦

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Johnny Peepers

----> is a socio-pathetic degenerate with a penchant for cheap booze, ruphy-laden broads, and dim sum soup.


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